Today I will cover 2 more of the 13 Major Mistakes Managers or even parents make that prohibit them from being leaders. We welcome your feedback. The first mistake I wish to talk about today is having a We/They environment.

What I mean by that is so often we see ourselves and our team as we and everyone else as they. Whenever we refer to senior management or Corporate as they we are driving a wedge between our people and senior management. My best friend John Miller, author of “QBQ!” “The Questing Behind the Question,” Flipping the Switch” and “Outstanding” often tells the experience he had working with a major medical firm where the field sales force had a nickname for the corporate office. They called it SPC, The Sales Prevention Club. Ridicules, but true. We must help out people see our entire organization as WE! Please watch your pronouns

The next mistake is treating everyone the same way. They are not the same and must be treated differently. Do you see your kids as being the same? Of course not, then why do we treat our people as they are exactly the same. Learn about them, their Idiosyncrasies and use them to communicate more effectively. Don’t tell them, sell them on your ideas and the ides of senior management.

Remember, you can see W. Steven Brown share Leadership information on a video preview of Leadership in Action dropdown at the top of this page. Take a look, it can’t hurt. Have a great day.

So far I have shared 4 mistakes managers or even parents make with their people or kids. Another mistake is we condone incompetent behavior by ignoring it, rather than confronting it quickly and effectively. I’ll save how to confront effectively for later. What we do is ignoring it is we think it ‘s no big deal and will probably go away. We see it again and again let it pass but the third time we see it we get mad and what we do is attack the person and not deal with the behavior. We belittle the person or worse, read them the riot act in front of their peers because we think everyone needs to hear this message. All that does is kill our relationship with everyone and does nothing to resolve the situation.

The next mistake I want to share is probably one of the more frustrating. We feel it’s our job to motivate our people. You might inspire but you can’t motivate. Motivation is internal and personal. A person either has or they don’t. If they don’t you can’t give it to them. In 35 years in the training industry I’ve seen more time wasted and money spent on motivational programs that are so short lived. Think about a manager sends a person to a motivational program. When they come back, they are like a changed person. “Excuse me while I run through the wall.” After a few days what do they look like? The same old person! When I say we can’t motivate, it could be a misnomer because Leaders train and develop the skills of people to allow the natural motivation to come out of the person. There is a huge difference between building skills and motivational feel good material.

In case you are wondering I have been sharing mistakes that come from a book authored by W. Steven Brown entitled “13 Fatal Errors Managers Make….and How You Can Avoid Them.” This book is the foundation for our multimedia training system entitled “Leadership in Action. You will fund more information on this system, including a video preview, on the above on the drop down tab. Please feel free to explore our site and if you or someone you know are interested in learning more about our training systems, please contact me. Thanks and have a great day!

Earlier, I shared 2 mistakes that prohibit managers from being effective Leaders and even parents and today I cover a couple of more.

The next error is trying to control results rather than influence thinking. If a person doesn’t hit the target or objective, too many manager talk only about the numbers and their failure to hit them. People are a product of their thinking. If you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right! Managers would find it much easier to get the person focused on the target or objective by building the person’s belief. Successful people are successful because they belief in 3 things. The first is the company they represent, next the products or services, internal or external, that they provide and lastly they believe in themselves. Leader’s build their people’s belief, manager’s talk about numbers or the lack of them.

Another weak area or mistake a manager makes is being the buddy not the boss. I don’t like the word boss but it is the best I can use right now. Many managers are promoted up through the ranks simply because they have done a good job they are promoted to manager, often of the same group. They naturally have, or appear to have, stronger relationships with some more than others. This leads them to cut corners for people and show favoritism or what is perceived that way. Leaders never put themselves in comprising positions with anyone they lead! Thanks and have a great day!

Ever had a salesperson call on you. You liked the person but really didn’t want the product or service they were selling, so when the time came you shared little white lie to let them down as gently as possible. More sales are lost by experienced salespeople because we try attempt to answer excuses or little white lies than any other reason.

Continue reading →

Yesterday I was talking to one of my neighbors, Jack, who shared an experience he had with his cable company. It seems he had a problem with his cable service so he called their customer service group, or at least that’s who he thought they were. I won’t mention the company by name but we all know them. After going through what he called seemingly endless prompts he finally got to a real person.

Jack said he was quickly told that he should have listen closer to the prompts because he had reached the wrong department. He had the problem, and now it was becoming his fault. Fortunately, he was connected to the correct department. After explaining his problem for the second time he was told how to fix it and did so. Everything was fine, his problem was solved. However, the story is not over yet.

Continue reading →

Every organization we at QBQ, Inc. work with tells us the biggest problem they have is “communication.” We all know how challenging effective communication can be. Of course, it’s always framed this way: “Why don’t they communicate better?” In other words, people know there’s a problem, but don’t think it’s their problem. “If only they would communicate better, things would be great around here!” we’re told.

Well, as believers in personal accountability, you know it’s not someone else’s job to understand me, rather it’s my job to work on being understood. In other words, I need to own the problem.

So, with this whole communication problem in mind, let me introduce you to a friend, who happens to be my speaking coach and writing partner—David Levin. Suffice it to say, I would not be what and where I am today if this wonderful gent hadn’t come alongside me in 1995. And that’s exactly why I am excited to share with you a bit from the Introduction of his brand new book, Don’t Just Talk, Be Heard. Enjoy!

John G. Miller, author of …

QBQ! The Question Behind the Question Flipping the Switch … Unleash the Power of Personal Accountability Outstanding … 47 Ways to Make Your Organization Exceptional —————————————–

INTRODUCTION: The Communication Gap

I was driving along one afternoon, not far from home, when suddenly I noticed police lights flashing in my rearview mirror. Really? I thought. For me? No. It can’t be me. I always think it is, but it never is. So I slowed down, moved over a bit to let the car pass. But … it didn’t pass. It stayed behind me. The siren blipped. Wow. It is me! I can’t believe it! So I pulled all the way over and stopped. The car stopped behind me. The officer got out, and approached.

To fully appreciate this story, there’s something you need to know about me. I can be a very literal person. When someone speaks, I tend to get locked on the specific words they use, and the literal meaning of those words. That may not sound like such a bad thing, but when the literal meaning is different from what the other person is really saying—which happens more often than you might think—it can get me into trouble. And this is especially likely to happen when I’m under stress of some sort, like, say, being pulled over by the cops. So, with that in mind, back to our story …

The officer approached. I rolled down my window. I was on high alert, listening very carefully, wanting to be every bit the good, cooperative citizen. He said, “Do you have your license and registration?”

Notice, please, he did not say, “May I have your license and registration?” No. What he said was, “Do you have your license and registration?” which is a completely different question.

I heard the question. I processed. Then, after careful consideration—and in my most respectful, humble, and sincere manner—answered, “Yes.” That’s it. Just “yes.” And then I sat there, looking at him, waiting for his next question.

Effective communication is the subject of this book, and that was not it.

How do I know? Well, the look on the officer’s face, for one thing. (Think, Dirty Harry.) Seriously? You’re messing with me? he seemed to be thinking. You think that’s funny? All right, wise guy, I’ll show you funny. And boy, did he. The charge: Going 42 in a 30 mph zone. The fine: $126. Hilarious.

So no, that was not effective communication on my part, and not just because of the ticket. The real problem was that there was a huge gap between my intention and the officer’s perception of me, between what I was trying to say and what he actually heard. Remember, I fully intended to be respectful and cooperative. That’s what I thought I was doing. But what he heard from me was essentially the complete opposite of that. How does that happen? How is it possible for there to be such a huge gap between who we are and how we come off to others?

This book is about that gap: The gap between intention and perception. …

Effective communication may be the subject of this book, but it’s really just a means to an end. Here’s what this book is really about:

• Building a better business • Being a better leader • Finding a job that’s more suited to you • Building stronger relationships • Being more successful at whatever you do

It’s just that communicating more effectively is the quickest—and best—way to get there. So, as you read through the book, keep in mind the real benefits of doing the work: It will help you reach your goals—and make a real difference in your life. —————————————–

If you enjoyed QBQ! and Flipping the Switch, both of which David helped me write, you will enjoy Don’t Just Talk. Considering how important communication is to anyone’s success, this book is a worthwhile investment. Click here to learn more about it. Good stuff!

John G. Miller

In the uncertain times every business faces today, there is one thing that is certain. We must produce more with less. Never before has Leadership Development been so needed. I mention that because most managers become managers because they are good workers at their job.

This does not qualify them to be an effective Leader. Too many managers think it’s their job to make their teams dependent upon them when in reality it’s their job to make their teams independent of them. You don’t rate Leaders on how badly the team needs them but what the team can do without the Leader.

Continue reading →